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Why order take out when you can make your own Chinese lemon chicken at home? There are a few different versions of lemon chicken out there, all coming from different countries. Probably the most popular type of lemon chicken would be baked in the oven. We all know baked lemon chicken is great but here is the Chinese version – just like take out or at the buffets. The Chinese version varies greatly from that of other cultures. Like most types of Chinese chicken the chicken is first cut into small chunks, battered, and then deep fried and covered with a sweet-lemon sauce. I do have a confession to make, I used yellow food coloring to get the sauce that amazing bright yellow color. If you have some yellow food coloring on hand, just add a drop or two into the sauce before you heat it. This recipe goes great served with rice and broccoli. Enjoy.
Chinese Lemon ChickenChinese Lemon Chicken
2 1/2lbs boneless-skinless chicken breasts (cut into 1” cubes)
2 tablespoons soy sauce
½ teaspoon salt
2 large eggs
¼ cup cornstarch
½ teaspoon baking powder
1 pinch white pepper
oil (for frying)
1/3 cup sugar
1 cup chicken broth
1 ½ tablespoons cornstarch
2 tablespoons lemon juice
¾ teaspoon salt
3 slices of lemon (peeled)
2 tablespoons oil
yellow food coloring (optional)

Cooking Instructions:
Chinese Lemon ChickenChinese Lemon Chicken
Step 1: Place cut chicken breast pieces into a bowl and mix with 2 tablespoons of soy sauce and ½ teaspoon of salt. Cover and marinate in the refrigerator for 30 minutes.
Step 2: To make the batter – beat 2 large eggs with ¼ cup of cornstarch, a pinch of white pepper and baking powder. Coat the chicken with the batter.
Step 3: Heat deep fryer to 350 degrees and deep-fry in batches until chicken is fully cooked. Drain on paper towels and set aside. You can also cook the chicken using a wok if you don’t have a deep fryer.
Chinese Lemon ChickenChinese Lemon Chicken
Step 4: Now, to make the lemon sauce – combine 1/3 cup of sugar, 2 tablespoons cornstarch, 1 cup chicken broth, 2 tablespoons lemon juice, and ¾ teaspoon salt (if using food coloring you can add it now). Mix until well combined and add 3 slices of lemon to the sauce mixture.
Step 5: Heat 2 tablespoons of oil in your wok and stir in the lemon sauce mixture and heat until well mixed and sauce becomes clear. Remove lemon slices and pour the sauce over the chicken and mix. Best served with rice and broccoli.

Deep Thoughts

(by Jack Handey)

If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go,
because, man, they're gone.
If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them
down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.
To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when
you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a
hand?" You can say, "Sorry, got these sacks."
One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going
to take my nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old
burned-out warehouse. "Oh no," I said, "Disneyland burned down."

He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a
pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but
decided to go home instead.
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
If you lived in the Dark Ages and you were a catapult operator, I
bet the most common question people would ask is, "Can't you make it
shoot farther?" "No, I'm sorry. That's as far as it shoots."
Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo,
flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a
beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful
painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.
I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our
children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.
If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell
him is, "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute
thing to tell him is, "Probably because of something you did."
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself in the
mirror, because I bet that's what REALLY throws you into a panic.
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first
instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant and she
fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no
choreography and the dancers hit each other.
I hope if dogs ever take over the world and they choose a king, they
don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with
some good ideas.
If life deals you lemons, why not go kill someone with the lemons
(maybe by shoving them down his throat).
Instead of having "answers" on a math test, they should just call
them "impressions," and if you got a different "impression," so what,
can't we all be brothers?
Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort
of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out
that I'd just quit my job and become a bum for a few years, because
I was thinking about doing that anyway.
I think a good gift for the President would be a chocolate revolver.
And since he's so busy, you'd probably have to run up to him real
quick and hand it to him.
Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word
itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words "mank" and
"ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery and so is mankind.
If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying
forward into the future, it's probably best to avoid eye contact.
It's easy to sit there and say you'd like to have more money. And I
guess that's what I like about it. It's easy. Just sitting there,
rocking back and forth, wanting that money.
If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer,
I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kinda scary. I've
wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I
went to the circus and a clown killed my dad.
As the light changed from red to green to yellow and back to red
again, I sat there thinking about life. Was it nothing more than a
bunch of honking and yelling? Sometimes it seemed that way.
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate.
And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
I hope some animal never bores a hole in my head and lays its eggs in
my brain, because later you might think you're having a good idea but
it's just eggs hatching.
Whenever you read a good book, it's like the author is right there,
in the room talking to you, which is why I don't like to read good books.
What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing
and the wind rustling through the leaves, that makes you want to get
drunk? And after you're real drunk, maybe go down to the public park
and stagger around and ask people for money, and then lay down and go
to sleep.
Instead of a trap door, what about a trap window? The guy looks out
it, and if he leans too far, he falls out. Wait. I guess that's like
a regular window.
During the Middle Ages, probably one of the biggest mistakes was not
putting on your armor because you were "just going down to the corner."
If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like
I am now.
When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call
the police. But then I got curious about it. I picked it up, and
started wondering who this person was, and why he had deer horns.
I remember how my great-uncle Jerry would sit on the porch and
whittle all day long. Once he whittled me a toy boat out of a larger
toy boat I had. It was almost as good as the first one, except now it had
bumpy whittle marks all over it. And no paint, because he had whittled
off the paint.
Here's a good thing to do if you go to a party and you don't know
anybody: First take out the garbage. Then go around and collect any
extra garbage that people might have, like a crumpled napkin, and
take that out too. Pretty soon people will want to meet the busy
garbage guy.
Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights,
even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're
talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.
If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet
it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading
a magazine.
If your friend is already dead, and being eaten by vultures, I think
it's okay to feed some bits of your friend to one of the vultures, to
teach him to do some tricks. But only if you're serious about adopting
the vulture.
Broken promises don't upset me. I just think, why did they believe me?
If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while
you're in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on
a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't know what to tell you.
One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run
with a wooden stake.
If you go to a costume party at your boss's house, wouldn't you think
a good costume would be to dress up like the boss's wife? Trust me,
it's not.
Most of the time it was probably real bad being stuck down in a
dungeon. But some days, when there was a bad storm outside, you'd look
out your little window and think, "Boy, I'm glad I'm not out in that."
Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over
here, looking through your stuff.
For mad scientists who keep brains in jars, here's a tip: why not add
a slice of lemon to each jar, for freshness?

Customizing Windows info


Amazing Useless “Facts” (and the actual facts)


I’m getting sick of these lists of “amazing facts” that are complete baloney. In the interest of keeping my readers from being uneducated and gullible, I decided to whip up this list - references are linked to. This is the latest list I received, verbatim, followed by the facts that contradict the “facts” (or at least show you why the fact isn’t really all that amazing):

  • “I am.” is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

“Go,” used in the imperative mode is the shortest sentence in the English language (especially because you can use body language as a compliment referring to “there” or “away”). “I am,” is not a complete sentence. “Am,” would need a compliment to turn it into a predicate (i.e. “I am stupid”) - you can’t use body language like you can with “Go”. If you don’t like using modes, try “I go.” (Edit: Okay, whiz kids who think I’m wrong, a sentence needs a subject and a complete predicate - which can be implied. “I am” is a sentence just like “Q” is a sentence when used as a response - like, “What letter comes after the letter P?”. If you say it to some random stranger on the street and they think you make sense, then it is probably a sentence. Imagine going up to somebody and telling them “Go!” They would understand that you want them to leave. If you walked up to someone on the street and said, “I am!” they would likely wonder what you were responding to, because it is not a complete sentence. I’m not going to keep repeating myself for the stupid people, so I found some references for them to go look at. Reference 1. Reference 2. Reference 3) If you want to argue it, I will probably make fun of you. I am not the nicest blogger in the world.

  • More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes.

There are more donkey related injuries than airplane deaths per year, but there are no statistics, nor has there ever been, to back up more donkey related deaths. There are roughly 1,200 airplane deaths per year.

  • The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.

“South America” and “North America.” Does that need a complete sentence or is it obvious enough?

  • The word “lethologica” describes the state of not being able to remember the word you want.

Aphasia” could just as easily be used here, given the generalized definition provided.

  • TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters on only one row of the keyboard.

What about pepperroot, pepperwort, perpetuity, pirouetter, prerequire, pretorture, proprietor, repertoire, repetitory? I’m sure we can think of even more words, and I’m only using the top row of keys on a QWERTY keyboard for those ones.

  • A snail can sleep for 3 years.

Snails don’t “sleep” - they enter a state of torpor - no brain function and the appearance of being dead. Believe it or not, I actually raised snails for a season - even got 3rd place at the Great Folsom Snail Race.

  • The longest word in the English language is 1909 letters long and it refers to a distinct part of DNA.

The word referred to is LATIN and GREEK, not English. It is only used by a very small group of scientists, too, and would not appear in any English dictionary. But maybe they are actually trying to say it is the longest word in the world, regardless of language… a distinction that, with four more letters, already belongs to:

Methionylglutaminylarginyltyrosy -
lglutamylserylleucylphenylalanylalanylglutaminy -
lleucyllysylglutamylarginyllysylglutamylglycyla -
lanylphenylalanylvalylprolyphenylalanYlvalythre -
onylleucylglycylaspartylprolylglycylisoleucylg -
lutamylglutaminylsErylleucyllysylisoleucy -
laspartylthreonylleucylIsoleucylglutamy -
lalanylglycylalanylasparthlalanylleucylg -
lutamylleucylglycylisoleucylprolylphenylalanylse -
Rylaspartylprolylleucylalanylaspartylglycylp -
RolylthreOnylisoleucylglutaminylasPfraginylal -
anylthreonylleucylarfinylalanylphenylalanylalany -
lalanylglycylvalythreonylprolylalanylglutaminy -
lcysteinylphenylalanylglutamylmethionylleucy -
lalanylleuOylisoleucylarginylglutaminy -
llysyhistidylprolylthreonylisoleucylproly -
lisoleucylglycylleucylmethionyltyrosylalany -
lasparaginylleucylvalylphenylalanylasparaginy -
llysyglycylisoleucylaspartylglutamylphenylalany -
lthrosylalanylglutaminylcsteinylglutamyllysylva -
lylglycylvalylaspartylserylvalylleucylvalylalny -
laspartylvalylprolylvalylglUtaminylglutamylsery -
lalanylprolylphenylalanylarginylglutaminylalany -
lalanylleucylarginylhistidylasparaginyvalylalany -
lprolylisoleucylprolylisoleucylphenylalanylisoleucy -
lphenylalanylisoleucylcysteinylprolylprolylaspartylalany -
laspartylaspartylaspartylleucylleucylarginy -
lglutaminylisoleucylalanylseryltyrosylglycy -
larginylglycyltyrosylthreonyltyrOsylleucyl -
leucylserylarginylalanylglycylvalylthreony -
lglycylalanylglutamYlasparainylarginylalany -
lalanylleucylprolylleucylasparaginylhistidy -
lleucylValylalanyllysylleucyllysylglutamy -
ltyrosylasparaginylalanylalanylprolylpro -
lylleucylglutaminylglgycylphenylalanylglycy -
lisoleucylserylalanylprolylaspartylglutaminy -
lvalyllysylalanylalanylisoleucylaspartylalany -
lglycylalanylalanylglycylalanylisoleucylsery -
lglycylserylalanylisoleucylvalyllysylisoIeucy -
lisoleucylglutamylglutaminylHistidylasparaginy -
liSoleucylglutamylprolylglutamyllysylmethionyl -
leucylalanylalanylleucyllysylvalylphenylalanyl -
calylglutaminylprolylmethionlysylalanylalanylt -

  • Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, dogs only have about ten.

Blatantly false. Somebody must have spent too much time hanging out with a very quiet dog. Try going on YouTube and looking up “talking dog.” A dog can make fewer vocal sounds than a cat, but far more than ten.

  • Feb 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

February 1865 did in fact have a full moon, though there was no full moon in the Februaries of 1866, 1885, 1915, 1934, 1961, and 1999. Go figure.

  • Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

Almost any spice, when injected in the body, is extremely poisonous. Try shooting up some cardamom. I wonder if this was intended to imply how poisonous nutmeg is when taken in large quantities, orally? It has been shown to cause extremely intense hallucinations.

  • The strongest muscle in the body is the TONGUE.

I don’t know where people came up with this one. It has no basis in fact. Despite the fact that the tongue is made up of 16 seperate muscles, each fiber of a muscle, no matter where, exerts about 0.3 micronewtons of force. Gram per gram (compressed muscle), the myometrial layer in a woman’s uterus (yes, it is a muscle) is the strongest muscle a human has.

  • It’s impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

I have sneezed with my eyes open. It is not natural, but it is easily done. And no, your eyeballs won’t pop out. They even did a debunking of it on Mythbusters.

  • Polar bears are left-handed.

Most polar bears are right handed. The best explanation for the confusion I could find was that they use their dominant paw to cover their nose (not a likely explanation at all, however - see comments from Des and Gryndyl), to blend in while waiting beside their prey. They catch their prey (primarily seals) by either biting their heads or swatting at them (with their left paw) to knock them onto the ice when they surface. Some of the studies on the subject can be very misleading because it appears that polar bears always attack with their left paw, but during casual interactions they revert to their right. I suspect the true reason is something along the lines of them requiring stability when attacking and thus, keeping their footing with the right paw is more effective.

polar bear playing right handed

  • The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds, that makes the catfish rank #1 for animal having the most taste buds.

Catfish do have a lot of taste buds, but most of them do not transmit anything. They are completely non-functional. It is like bragging about having the most cars of anybody in Texas… but it is only because you own the garbage dump where they drop off wrecked cars.

  • Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.

First, I’m going to assume that there was a typo here and they meant to say mammals, since fish, snakes, eels, brine shrimp, etc., can’t jump. But even among mammals, I’ve never heard of a hippo being able to jump. How about a guinea pig? They can barely hop with the limited joints in their back legs. Sloths? (Edit: according to some comments I’ve received, I’m wrong because jumping can just mean “to be full of activity or bustling” - just to clarify, even an elephant could have this attributed to them, despite their inability to rapidly extend their extremities in order to gain enough vertical velocity to significantly propel them from the ground. The “fact” I criticize here is wrong, regardless of any of these arguments.)

  • Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

This is as true as saying gasoline is made with Stegosauruses’ remains. Extracted peanut oil could be used to make glycerin that could be further processed to make nitroglycerin, and nitroglycerin is one of the ingredients commonly used for making dynamite, but peanuts are hardly a required ingredient.

  • A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

Pufferfish can blink. Last I checked, that was a fish - I mean, it is part of their name. Most sharks actually roll their eyes back in their head, rather than blinking, too.

  • Two-thirds of the world’s eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

New Jersey produces about 0.1% of the world’s eggplant, by the numbers. They produce roughly half the amount that comes out of California, alone.

  • The longest one-syllable word in the English language is “screeched.”

Scrootched is a word. Look it up (it is under the word “scrootch,” a variant of “scrooch”). It is longer than screeched, but still one syllable.

  • No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver or purple.

Hunth, a word meaning a hundred thousand. Sporange as a variant of sporangium per Webster’s Third Unabridged and the Oxford English Dictionary. Chilver as an ewe lamb per the Oxford English Dictionary. Hirple, meaning to limp. Look them up. They are, in fact, words (though hirple is a Scottish English word, so it might not be in everybody’s dictionary).

  • There are only four words in the English language which end in “- dous”: tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.

How about amadous, apodous, decapodous, iodous, nodous, nonhazardous, palladous, ultrahazardous, and vanadous? Yep, they are all words.

  • A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.

A cat has 0 muscles in each ear. They do have about 30 muscles at the base of their ears. Am I being petty?

  • A dragonfly has a lifespan of 24 hours.

A dragonfly’s lifespan is up to 6 months.

  • A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

A goldfish can remember an event for about 3 months. See multiple studies on this for more info. It is pretty interesting.

  • In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed to speak.

The correct term is Speaker of the House of Commons, and they are allowed to speak, but are required to take an impartial position and can’t argue one side over another. Their position is a little bit similar to a judge’s at a trial.

  • There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.

Regulation size golf balls can have anywhere from 300-500 dimples.

  • You can’t lick your own elbow.

If you are flexible or have a long tongue, yes you can. I happen to have a very long tongue, and can almost reach it. There are groups of people on YouTube that post videos of themselves doing this very thing.

Is any of this enlightening?

Movie Posters

A great movie poster is a hard thing to find. Most posters are cut and paste jobs that don't sell the movie very well at all. A great poster should intrigue, shock, inspire & excite. It should be aesthetically beautiful or original. Above all, it should be so memorable that a single glance will be instantly recognizable.

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11 Reality Shows That Prove The Apocalypse Is Upon Us


Reality shows are difficult to understand. "Reality" refers to how "real" something is, so a television show labeled "reality" would have to be "realistic," right? And yet, you've never found yourself in a tuxedo handing roses to 28 year-old investment bankers with Ph.D's in neuroscience and years of training at a Tibetan Tantric-sex monastery. And you've probably never lived in a Hollywood mansion with the dad from Wonder Years and the fat, untalented Baldwin. With that in mind, check out our list of the reality shows that prove the Apocalypse is upon us.

11.) MTV’s A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila

Shot At Love With Tila Tequila

What is this crap?
Disappointingly famous for no reason “Tila Tequila” (real name Tila Nguyen) is the star of this mind-bogglingly awful reality show in which contestants compete for her affection. BUT HERE’S THE KICKER! She’s bi-sexual**. The show follows around the sheep-like participants as they vie for the attention of someone not much more famous than they are.
**She isn’t bi-sexual as made evident by the fact that she has a boyfriend. And come on, tons of girls kiss other girls at parties for attention.

Moment That Proves The Apocalypse Is Upon Us:
After the first season ended, series winner Bobby Banhart didn’t actually get to fall in love with Tila, as is evident by his incoherent Kindergarten-esque writing style on MySpace when he wrote; “well everyone wants to know so here it is she never called me after the last show and no one would give me her number so pretty much I feel like and ass but we are not 2gather u cant have a realationship bye urself ya know so now you all know and sometimes no matter how bad you want things to work out they dont and theres nothing you can do i tryed… thank you all.” Yes, those are his actual words.

10.) Fox’s Trading Spouses

Trading Spouses

What is this crap?
The show seems like a great idea for men right off the bat: “Get rid of your wife for two weeks! But wait: you get another, a crazier one, in her place. And you thought it was hard not to punch your regular wife!” Fox decided to see how zany it would be if you switched moms with families completely different than their own. According to Fox producers, the “putting a conservative mom in a liberal household and visa versa” concept never gets old.

Moment That Proves The Apocalypse Is Upon Us:
God fearing and bat-shit insane Christian fundamentalists are always good for a laugh, and putting an especially insane (and grotesquely fat) one in a house that practices astrology and other pagan-esque worship techniques means some serious shit is gonna go down. When the woman named Margaret got home, she proceeded to scream and rant about “the dark side” and proclaimed she was “a God warrior.” She even went as far as to tear up the check Fox gave her family for their troubles, which is exactly how Jesus Christ used to act in any given situation.

9.) Bravo's Millionaire Matchmaker

Millionaire Matchmaker

What is this crap?
Bruce Wayne was a gazillionaire with all the coolest playthings; the Batcave, Batmobile, Bat utility belt, Robin. He knew how to keep it classy. The dude always had tons of chicks around him, and he was flaunting his money like a millionaire/superhero should. It was partly because he had to keep up a high-profile lifestyle, but also because he loved getting the D-wet, just like anyone. The millionaire's on Bravo's Millionaire Matchmaker are all idiots. They have all the money they could want, and no idea how to pick up chicks. "Hey babe, I have lots of money." Boom. She's in your car, and her boyfriend is left standing on the curb thinking, "When my bumper sticker company gets big, she'll come back."

Moment That Proves The Apocalypse Is Upon Us:
Dumb-ass millionaire Paul from Las Vegas showed us why he's got a pile of money and no women when he took out former Playboy cyber girl of the week Cidney. He used the classic equation for scoring chicks: He told her he's "not a risk taker" and is "afraid of heights." Logically, the first thing you should do is book a helicopter ride over Las Vegas. Another thing you should do to avoid looking like a desperately creepy super nerd stuck in a successful person's body is ask your date's family over the phone if it's ok to marry their daughter. And oh yeah, make sure you've known the girl for less than a day. With that in mind, take her back to your place and propose marriage to her as awkwardly as possible. Surely, she'll find your nervous demeanor and awkwardly sweaty palms endearing as she tearfully calls her friends to say she's bagged a million-dollar fuck up.

8.) VH1's Flavor of Love

Flavor Of Love With Flavor Flav

What is this crap?
Remember that movie Cloverfield? The giant alien monster is walking around New York City ruining everyone's shit, and as if that's not bad enough, a ton of small, equally vicious monsters are falling off of it, killing everyone else? That's Flavor of Love. The Surreal Life is the giant Cloverfield monster that spawned Strange Love featuring Brigitte Nielsen and Flavor Flav, which in turned spawned the demon known as Flavor of Love.

Moment That Proves the Apocalypse is Upon Us:

The world was shocked when, after being eliminated, serious white trash slut "Pumkin" went toe-to-toe with the terrifying "New York." New York hurled insults at Pumkin as Pumkin walked out, which Pumkin responded to with a horrifying loogie.

7.) Bravo's Real Housewives of New York City

Real Housewives of NYC

What is this crap?
This show follows around annoying and over privileged socialites who live in Manhattan and the Hamptons. They enjoy shopping, talking about shopping, driving to the mall, and discussing how the Calabi-Yau manifold has effected the advancement of pure mathematics. Imagine if you made $9 million more a year. Now, envision the things you would do with your $9,000,500; look at the places you would go, the house you'd buy, women you would bang. Isn't it interesting? That's exactly the opposite of this show. Instead of using their money for anything important, the women gossip and socialize like a bunch of sorority sluts, which they were 20 years ago.

Moment That Proves the Apocalypse is Upon Us:
RHWONYC has made a tremendous philanthropical donation to YOU! That's right, in one episode, the women provide an obnoxiously elitist list of ways to fit-in with Manhattan's high society. Is "be an incredibly stuck up whorebag whenever possible" one of them? Not in that many words, but each rule on the list implies that anyway. Some of our favorite tips include "Make a large philanthropical donation in your name...because we care about long as they aren't poor and don't look at me or touch me or anything," and "Never wear the same outfit twice." One of the wives actually says "You know the only thing that makes me sad? That I can never wear this again." You know what makes a child in Darfur sad? Contemplating whether he should bury his best friend, or eat him.

6.) E!'s Keeping Up with the Kardashians

Keeping Up with the Kardashians

What is this crap?
This drivel follows the lives of the Kardashian family. Who are they, exactly? Exactly. They're no one. Does the name Robert Kardashian ring a bell? No? How about O.J. Simpson? Kardashian defended OJ in that little trial that OJ was involved in during the mid-90s. His family is still super rich, and deserve a reality show for some reason. Probably the only notable member of the cast is Kim Kardashian, whose sex tape has been masturbated to by many men across the country. The problem with the show? It isn't about anything. None of the people here are actually famous or talented or can give any credible reason why they deserve to continue living.

Moment That Proves the Apocalypse is Upon Us:
Kim purchases a Bentley, which causes friction among her less attractive sisters. The insults fly, and someone calls Kim "Mariah Carey," which would be funny if they were implying that Kim is bat-shit insane, but really it was to imply that she's a diva. Would have been hilarious 12 years ago, but hey, when you're dealing with the brainpower of the Kardashians, that's the best insult you get. The episode culminates in Kim LITERALLY throwing her Blackberry and crying on her bed while her sisters watch with little remorse. That'll show 'em. And that is how boring this show is...that is its most crazy moment.

5.) NBC's Celebrity Circus

Celebrity Circus

What is this crap?
Some celebrities are lifetime celebrities for a reason. Tom Hanks and Meryl Streep win Academy Awards, John Mayer bangs Jessica Simpson, and Wee-Man joins the cast of celebrity reality shows. It's just how you get invited to the big parties. Anonymity is kryptonite to the semi-famous, and they'll do whatever it takes to stay in the limelight. This conversation has definitely taken place:

Christopher Knight: I'll do whatever it takes to be on TV sir, anything....(attempts to fellate producer)
Producer: (Pushes him away) Umm, how about you just live in a house with Da Brat and Verne Troyer, among other worthless former celebs?
Christopher Knight: Oh...well, that's fine too...(continues to attempt fellatio)

Moment That Proves The Apocalypse Is Upon Us:
A very large and muscular man gets into a wheel and spins on it for a really long time. Looks simple enough. That's why Christopher Knight of The Brady Bunch fame decides to get in. Does his spin go well? Thankfully, no. Immediately, Knight falls face first onto the ground, shattering his shoulder.

4.) The Oxygen Network's The Bad Girls Club

Bad Girls Club

What is this crap?
The Bad Girls Club is a popular show on The Oxygen Network, which is a network similar to Lifetime, without all the made-for-TV movies about rape. The reason they made it? Oprah and some of her high-powered buddies wanted a network so that women could watch a channel they could relate to, unlike MTV, VH1, and the History Channel. (Insert image: Four women on a white sofa, wearing turtlenecks, holding glasses of red wine, giggling.) So where did The Bad Girls Club come from? It's basically a show about the slutty girls you knew in college who never woke up one day and said "I pledge to stop blowing guys just because they're on the football team." Oxygen threw them all into a house, gave them some booze, and waited for them to go nuts. After all the fighting and crying, the girls realized it was time to start drinking, and everything started all over again.

Moment That Proves the Apocalypse is Upon Us:
In episode 2 of the first season, self-proclaimed "black out queen" Ripsi, whose stupid name actually falls short of her real-life stupidity, goes on a Cosmopolitan induced rampage after her roommates threw her Ted Kennedy level drunk ass into a pool, which was a smart idea because severe drunkenness and swimming have a very rich and positive history. Unfortunately, some of the girls realized "Hey, what's that thing that happens when you don't breathe for a long time? What? Death? Pull her out, we're not even close to the season finale yet," and she was pulled out. She got up and went crazy, with all the hair pulling and awkwardly un-athletic open handed punches you can handle.

3.) Fox's Moment of Truth

Moment of Truth

What is this crap?
"Hey! Don't you hate your family, want to drown your wife, and fantasize about making love to wildlife? Oh, you'd rather not answer those questions? Well what if I gave you the chance to answer those questions and more on national television?!" That's Fox's Moment of Truth in a nutshell. It showcases America's unwavering dedication to the truth, as long as you're handsomely rewarded and your loved ones have the ability to instantly forget that they heard honest answers to the darkest secrets you hold. The more questions you answer, the more money you win, unless the lie detector finds you're lying, in which case, you go home with nothing but a pair of underpants loaded with the squishy feeling of regret. Want to make every Thanksgiving from now until your murder at the hands of your family impossibly awkward? Then Moment of Truth is for you.

Moment That Proves the Apocalypse is Upon Us:
Our nation's moral watering hole was severely poisoned by--not surprisingly--a New York housewife (no relation to above) named Lauren Cleri. Lauren's incredible honesty was hilariously overshadowed by revelations of her immoral behavior towards her marriage. She managed to answer honestly in front of her husband that she should have married her ex-boyfriend, and that she had cheated on him. But when it came down to the simple question of "Are you a good person?" the lie detector found that her answer of "Yes, I am" was shockingly false. Who knew?

2.) VH1's I Love Money

I Love Money - VH1

What is this crap?
"That's no moon...that's a space station." Much like the Death Star on Star Wars, this new creation by VH1 seems harmless from far away...but up close, it could easily destroy a planet. This is the show social scientists have been dreading since the dawn of television. It's a nice frothy glass of SARS, Ebola Virus, Bubonic Plague, and high fructose corn syrup mixed together. I Love Money takes the stars of other reality shows, and puts them together as they bathe and save the lives of impoverished children suffering from leprosy, and solve world hunger. Oh wait, it's the opposite of that. The cast of I Love Money is comprised of failures, not even the winners, from past shitty VH1 reality shows as they compete for the chance to win $250,000 by completing challenges like catching a turkey shot from a catapult, and building a tent. Seriously.

Moment That Proves The Apocalypse Is Upon Us:

Contestants compete in a game called "The Spit Olympics." It's pretty self explanatory. The contestants drink a colored beverage and then see how far they can spit it. Something tells us the ladies on the show will either win this competition by a landslide, or make themselves sick by swa...well, you get the idea.

1.) MTV's My Super Sweet 16

My Super Sweet 16 - MTV

What is this crap?
My Super Sweet 16 is a show about all the girls you hated in high school. In the movies, the girls are rich, bitchy, and hot, but My Super Sweet 16 flips that stereotype on its ear, by utilizing girls who are rich, bitchy, and generally unattractive.

Moment That Proves the Apocalypse is Upon Us:

On episode 3 of the first season, a young lady who you'd love to strangle named Ava is gearing up for her sweet 16 party. She is of Iranian descent, so she cleverly themes her party "An Arabian Night!" Wouldn't you love to see her attempt to survive for a night in the Middle East? Her parents are super rich, and prove the theorem that with money comes the inability to raise a child. Ava demands to wear a sexy dress for her party, although her body indicates she enjoys a pretty steady diet of the Bastani-e Za'farani. To find a dress, her parents fly her to fucking Paris, where not surprisingly, she finds nothing she likes. The horror culminates when her bitchy demeanor prompts her father to yell "If you stop whining, I'll get it for you!" about a custom made dress. In the end, he buys her a Range Rover despite declaring he wouldn't, which made her cry at dinner.


Try it!

Northern Lights


Where to go in case of zombies.


Crazy small writing


Convicted forger A. Schiller was serving his time in Sing
Sing prison in the late 1800s when guards found him dead in
his cell. On his body they found seven regular straight pins
whose heads measured the typical 47/1000ths of an inch or
1.17 millimeters in diameter. Under 500 magnification it was
found that the tiny etchings seen on the heads of the pins
were the words to The Lord's Prayer, which is 65 words and
254 letters long. Of the seven pins, six were silver and one
was gold - the gold pin's prayer was flawless and a true
masterpiece. Schiller had spent the last 25 years of his life
creating the pins, using a tool too small to be seen by the
naked eye. It is estimated that it took 1,863 sepatate carving
strokes to make it. Schiller went blind because of his

Crazy Questions at Google Job Interview


1. How many golf balls can fit in a school bus?

2. You are shrunk to the height of a nickel and your mass is proportionally reduced so as to maintain your original density. You are then thrown into an empty glass blender. The blades will start moving in 60 seconds. What do you do?

3. How much should you charge to wash all the windows in Seattle?

4. How would you find out if a machine’s stack grows up or down in memory?

5. Explain a database in three sentences to your eight-year-old nephew.

6. How many times a day does a clock’s hands overlap?

7. You have to get from point A to point B. You don’t know if you can get there. What would you do?

8. Imagine you have a closet full of shirts. It’s very hard to find a shirt. So what can you do to organize your shirts for easy retrieval?

9. Every man in a village of 100 married couples has cheated on his wife. Every wife in the village instantly knows when a man other than her husband has cheated, but does not know when her own husband has. The village has a law that does not allow for adultery. Any wife who can prove that her husband is unfaithful must kill him that very day. The women of the village would never disobey this law. One day, the queen of the village visits and announces that at least one husband has been unfaithful. What happens?

10. In a country in which people only want boys, every family continues to have children until they have a boy. if they have a girl, they have another child. if they have a boy, they stop. what is the proportion of boys to girls in the country?

11. If the probability of observing a car in 30 minutes on a highway is 0.95, what is the probability of observing a car in 10 minutes (assuming constant default probability)?

12. If you look at a clock and the time is 3:15, what is the angle between the hour and the minute hands? (The answer to this is not zero!)

13. Four people need to cross a rickety rope bridge to get back to their camp at night. Unfortunately, they only have one flashlight and it only has enough light left for seventeen minutes. The bridge is too dangerous to cross without a flashlight, and it�s only strong enough to support two people at any given time. Each of the campers walks at a different speed. One can cross the bridge in 1 minute, another in 2 minutes, the third in 5 minutes, and the slow poke takes 10 minutes to cross. How do the campers make it across in 17 minutes?

14. You are at a party with a friend and 10 people are present including you and the friend. your friend makes you a wager that for every person you find that has the same birthday as you, you get $1; for every person he finds that does not have the same birthday as you, he gets $2. would you accept the wager?

15. How many piano tuners are there in the entire world?

16. You have eight balls all of the same size. 7 of them weigh the same, and one of them weighs slightly more. How can you find the ball that is heavier by using a balance and only two weighings?

17. You have five pirates, ranked from 5 to 1 in descending order. The top pirate has the right to propose how 100 gold coins should be divided among them. But the others get to vote on his plan, and if fewer than half agree with him, he gets killed. How should he allocate the gold in order to maximize his share but live to enjoy it? (Hint: One pirate ends up with 98 percent of the gold.)

Do you still think you have what it takes to work for Google?

Maze Game


What is Maze Frenzy?
Its the wackiest and most exciting maze game on the internet!

Huge fudging snail!!!11!!!!!1

Giant snail

Giant snail

Giant snail

Giant snail

Coupon Codes!!! for all the things i dont buy online.. :(


Another Ascii converter...


A ton of Choco Chip cookie recipes.. Om nom nom nom <3


By Ruth Wakefield

There is no substitute for quality. Even in simple recipes, like mine for chocolate chip cookies, every ingredient's quality has an effect on the recipe's outcome.

Eggs: Always use fresh eggs. Eggs that are past their prime may exhibit a cloudy white and a flatter rather than rounder yolk. If you are not sure about the freshness of an egg, break it into a measuring cup to inspect it before adding it to the recipe. Washing your hands after handling eggs is good procedure. This is especially true if you are going to touch the cookie dough later or taste the dough as you prepare it.

Baking Soda: Arm & Hammer brand baking soda works fine.

Butter: There's no substitute for butter. If you can not use butter for health reasons, do not waste your time attempting to make a great chocolate chip cookie. They will be substandard. I prefer unsalted butter, but you can use salted butter. Name brand butter works better than a generic brands. Generic brands vary a great deal in their taste and texture. You should experiment. My recipe uses softened butter. Softened don't mean liquid butter. When butter becomes a liquid during softening the cookies texture will suffer greatly. My method for softening butter is to use a microwave safe mixing bowl put the butter in it and the mixing bowl goes on a turntable in a microwave. If you do not have a microwave turntable, you should rotate to the bowl every 30 seconds or so. Set the microwave level at low and microwave the butter for a minute or two. The stick of butter should still be shaped like a stick, but can be easily dented by a gentle touch of a finger. Microwave ovens will sometimes microwave the center of the butter and c melted a hole in the center. Don't worry if this happens, a small liquid amount will not seriously damage this recipe. To prevent this, move the butter around in the microwave when you rotate it.

If your butter does not fully soften you will just have to work harder with your mixing the butter into the ingredients, but exercise will do you good.

Salt: I prefer iodized table salt. Salt substitutes taste is not complementary to the cookies.

White Sugar: Grocery stores house brands are not equal to name brands in my experience. White sugars don't seem to vary from one brand to another in quality.

Cookies made with white sugar substitutes are not fit for human consumption.

Brown Sugar: Brown sugars do vary from one brand to the next and by how old they are. I prefer Domino brand brown sugar. If your brown sugar is hard as a rock, it will not make a great cookie. To dissolve hard brown sugar will require too much stirring and will change the texture of the cookie. Using a dark brown sugar will produce a darker stronger tasting cookie than using light brown sugar. In my experience, most people prefer cookies made with light brown sugar. If they don't have a choice, they seem to enjoy cookies made with dark brown sugar just fine.

Brown sugar substitutes do not result in edible chocolate chip cookies.

Vanilla: Whenever two bakers gather to talk baking the debate over whether to use real vanilla extract or imitation vanilla will likely arise. My experience is that real vanilla extract is absolutely necessary for some recipes. For example, I use real vanilla extract when I am adding the vanilla to a cooked custard that I use in a chocolate eclair cake. However, real vanilla extract seems to lose its flavor when exposed to high temperatures like those required to bake chocolate chip cookies. I recommend imitation vanilla extract for this recipe.

Flour: Selecting a flour is also a matter of personal preference. I prefer to use a harder flour. Hard flours will often have labels that say something like "better for bread." Cake flours produce a cookie with a finer texture which in my opinion is not desirable.

Chocolate Chips: The quality of chocolate chips varies greatly. Nestles Toll House chocolate chips are very good and are available at most markets. I personally don't enjoy the flavor of Hershey's chocolate chips. My preferred chocolate chip brand is Guittard. These chips are available through Sam's Club stores. When I can afford them, I also use Merkens' semisweet chocolate chips. Merkens' chocolate chips are available through The King Arthur Baker's Catalog(800-827-6836).

Nuts: Although most chocolate chip recipes call for walnuts, pecans are preferred by most everyone I have asked. Use whatever nuts you prefer, but don't say that you are using my recipe unless you use pecans. Nut quality is also very important and not easily obtained. Old nuts will be soft and mealy. Taste the pecans before you put them into the dough. If you feel like you would like to have a second or a third, use them. If the not, look for better quality nuts. The brands carried by Sam's Club an BJ's stores are excellent. The Diamond brand nuts found in most markets areas o so and overly expensive.


Alexis's Brown Sugar Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 lb. (4 sticks) unsalted butter
3 cups brown sugar
1 cup granulated sugar
4 eggs
2 tsp. vanilla
3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 tsp. salt
2 tsp. baking soda
1 1/2 cups real chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 375^. Cream butter until smooth; add sugars. Beat in eggs and vanilla. Sift flour, salt, and baking soda and beat into above mixture. Add chocolate chips. Drop 2 to 3 tablespoons of batter onto greased baking sheet, 2 inches apart. Bake 8 minutes. Remove from pans and cool on racks. Note: If cookies become hard while still on the baking sheet, put sheet back into the oven for a few seconds to soften them for easy removal.


Annette Funicello's Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Cookies

2 c Unsifted flour
1 c Sugar
1/2 tsp Baking soda
2 eggs
1/4 tsp Salt
1 tb Water
1/2 c Corn oil margarine, softened
1 tsp Vanilla
6 oz Semi-sweet chocolate chips
1/2 c Skippy creamy or super chunk peanut butter

In small bowl stir together flour, sugar, baking soda, and salt. In large bowl with mixer at low speed beat together margarine, peanut butter, eggs, water, and vanilla just until blended. Add flour mixture, beat until blended. Increase speed to medium; beat 2 minutes. Optional: stir chocolate pieces into batter. Drop by rounded tablespoonfuls 3 inches apart onto ungreased cookie sheets. Flatten slightly with floured bottom of glass. Bake in 375 F oven 10 to 12 minutes or until lightly browned. Cool on wire rack. Store in tightly covered container. Makes about 2-3 dozen.


Better Homes and Gardens Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 cup shortening
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 cups flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
2 cups chocolate chips
1 cup chopped nuts

Cream together first five ingredients until light and fluffy. Stir dry ingredients into creamed mixture. Stir in nuts and chocolate chips. Drop by heaping teaspoonful onto greased cookie sheet. Bake 10-12 minutes at 375 degrees . Makes 6-7 dozen.


Brooke's Sweet Chocolate Chip Cookies

1/2 c Butter, softened
1/3 c Sugar, granulated
1/3 c Brown sugar, packed
1 Egg
1 T Water
1/2 t Vanilla extract
1 1/4 c Flour, all-purpose
1/2 t Baking soda
1/4 t Salt
8 oz Sweet cooking chocolate, coarsely chopped

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Cream together thoroughly butter and sugars, using electric mixer. Add egg, water and vanilla and beat well. In a separate bowl, stir together flour, soda and salt. Blend dry ingredients into creamed mixture. Stir chopped chocolate pieces into batter by hand so they do not get too broken up. Drop from teaspoon 2" apart onto greased cookie sheet. Bake for about 13 minutes. Cool on racks. Yield: 3 1/2 dozen cookies


Butter Flavored Crisco Ultimate Chocolate Chip Cookie

3/4 c Butter flavored Crisco
1 1/4 c Firmly packed brown sugar
2 T Milk
1 T Vanilla
1 Egg
1 3/4 c All-purpose flour
1 t Salt
3/4 t Baking soda
1 c Semisweet chocolate chips
1 c Pecan pieces

Heat oven to 375. Cream butter flavor Crisco, brown sugar, milk, and vanilla in large bowl. Blend until creamy. Blend in egg. Combine flour, salt, and baking soda. Add to creamed mixture, gradually. Stir in chocolate chips and nuts. Drop rounded Tablespoonfuls (about 2 measuring tablespoons) of dough 3 inches apart on ungreased baking sheet. Bake at 375 8 to 10 minutes. For chewy cookies (they will look light and moist) DO NOT OVERBAKE or 11 to 13 minutes for crisp cookies. Cool on baking sheet 2 minutes. Remove to cooling rack. 3 dozen 3-inch cookies. Note: if nuts are omitted, use 1-1/2 cups semisweet chocolate chips.


Chemical Engineer Chocolate Chip Cookies

The following recipe for chocolate chip cookies appeared in Chemical & Engineering News (June 19, 1995). It was attributed to Jeannene Aackerman.

1. 532.35 cm3 gluten

2. 4.9 cm3 NaHCO3

3. 4.9 cm3 refined halite

4. 236.6 cm3 partially hydrogenated tallow triglyceride

5. 177.45 cm3 crystalline C12H22O11

6. 177.45 cm3 unrefined C12H22O11

To a 2-L jacketed round reactor vessel (reactor #1) with an overall heat-transfer coefficient of about 100 Btu/F-ft2-hr add one, two, and three with constant agitation.

In a second 2-L reactor vessel with a radial flow impeller operating at 100 rpm add four, five, six, and seven until the mixture is homogeneous.

To reactor #2 add eight followed by three equal portions of the homogeneous mixture in reactor #1. Additionally, add nine and ten slowly with constant agitation. Care must be taken at this point in the reaction to control any temperature rise that may be the result

of an exothermic reaction.

Using a screw extrude attached to a #4 nodulizer place the mixture piece-meal on a 316SS sheet (300 x 600 mm). Heat in a 460 K oven for a period of time that is in agreement with Frank & Johnston's first order rate expression (see JACOS, 21, 55), or until golden brown. Once the reaction is complete, place the sheet on a 25 C heat-

transfer table allowing the product to come to equilibrium.


Chocolate Chip Krispie Cookies

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup margarine, softened
1 cup sugar
1 egg
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 cups Kellogg's® Rice Krispies® cereal
1 package (6 oz., 1 cup) semi-sweet chocolate morsels
Vegetable cooking spray

In small mixing bowl combine flour, soda and salt. Set aside. In large mixing bowl, beat together margarine and sugar until light and fluffy. Add egg and vanilla. Beat well. Add flour mixture, mixing until combined. Stir in Kellogg's® Rice Krispies® cereal and chocolate morsels. Drop by level measuring tablespoon onto baking sheets coated with cooking spray. Bake at 350°F about 12 minutes or until lightly browned. Remove immediately from baking sheets and cool on wire racks. Store in airtight container.


Chocolate Chip Meringue Drops (Forgotten Cookies)

2 large egg whites
1/2 cup white sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 250 degrees F (120 degrees C). Line 2 baking sheets with aluminum foil or parchment and set aside. In large bowl of a mixer, beat the egg whites at moderately high speed until they hold stiff peaks. Beat in the sugar one tablespoon at a time, then beat in the vanilla extract. Reduce speed to low and beat in cocoa powder. With rubber spatula, fold in the chips. Note: May substitute 1/2 cup chopped pecans for the chips. Add a pinch of nutmeg and cinnamon to the egg whites if using the pecans.

Drop mixture by rounded teaspoonsful onto baking sheets, spacing one inch apart and bake for 1 hour. Turn off oven and dry cookies in oven 2 hours longer. Remove from pan and store in air tight container. Makes 40 cookies


Double Mint Chocolate Chip Cookies

3/4 c Margarine
1 1/2 c Brown sugar firmly packed
2 tbs Water
2 c Chocolate chips
2 ea Eggs
2 1/2 c Flour
1 1/4 tsp Baking soda
1/2 tsp Salt
12 oz Andres mint candy (2 boxes)

Melt margarine, add chips and stir until partially melted. Remove from heat and stir until chips are completely melted. Pour into large bowl. Add brown sugar and water and cool slightly. At high speed, beat in eggs one at a time. Reduce to low speed and add dry ingredients. Stir until blended. Chill dough. When ready to bake, line cookie sheets with foil. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Roll dough into very small balls (about 1/2 teaspoon per ball). Place 2 inches apart and bake for 10 minutes. Remove from oven and while cookies are still on pan, place half a candy piece on each cookie. Remove to waxed paper, wait about a minute and swirl the candy pieces across top of cookie.


Barbara Bush’s Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 c Flour & 2 tbs; sifted

1/2 tsp Baking soda

1/2 tsp Salt

1/2 c Butter; softened

1/3 c Sugar; brown firmly packed

1/3 c Sugar; granulated

1 Egg

1 1/2 tsp -Water; very hot

1/2 tsp Vanilla

1 c Chocolate chips;semisweet

Approx. Cook Time:10 minutes

Preheat oven to 375F. Grease baking sheets with vegetable oil. Sift flour, baking soda and salt on waxed paper. Beat butter, sugar and egg in large bowl till fluffy, about 3 minutes. Beat in hot water and vanilla. Gradually beat in flour mixture until blended and smooth. Drop dough by well rounded teaspoonfuls on prepared baking sheets. Bake in 375F oven till golden, about 10 minutes. Cook on sheets on wire rack to cool completely. Makes about 3 dozen cookies.


Doh! Boy Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

This recipe closely approximates (although better than) the Pillsbury Ready-Made Chocolate Chip Cookies available at your Groceries Dairy Section. It's unique in that it uses Marshmallow Creme for sugar. Since marshmallow creme expands when heated.

1/2 cup Butter (1 stick)*

1/2 cup Vegetable Shortening (Crisco Butter Flavor)*

1 cup Brown Sugar, Light, Packed

7 oz Marshmallow Creme or Marshmallow Fluff (1 jar)

1 large Egg

3 tsp Vanilla Extract

3 cup All-Purpose Flour

2 tsp Baking Powder*

1 tsp Salt

1 1/2 cup Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips (most of a 12 oz package)

1 cup Chopped Walnuts (4 oz package - optional)

Soften butter/shortening in a microwave oven (use a microwave safe mixing bowl or glass measuring cup) stirring every 15 seconds until very soft. Add brown sugar, salt, marshmallow creme, baking powder, and vanilla and beat well. Add egg and beat until creamy. Add flour mixture (1/2 cup at a time) while beating. Add chocolate chips and nuts (optional). Refrigerate for 1-3 hours in covered bowl. Pre-heat oven to 375°F. Drop onto a waxed paper lined, room-temperature, air-bake cookie sheet in large rounded tablespoonful size (or small ice-cream scooper). Bake 10-12 minutes checking every two minutes after 8 minutes for golden brown appearance. Waxed paper may smoke so keep area well ventilated. Remove sheet from oven and let stand 5 minutes before transferring to a cool/flat surface. Rinse and dry cookie sheet between batches. Makes about [4] dozen cookies.


Double Tree Hotel Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 1/2 C. butter -- softened
1 1/2 C. granulated sugar
3/4 C. firmly packed brown sugar
4 eggs
2 1/2 tsp. Vanilla
1 tsp. lemon juice
3 C. all-purpose flour
3/4 C. old-fashioned oatmeal -- uncooked
3/4 tsp. Baking Soda
1 tsp. Salt
1/4 tsp. Ground Cinnamon
3 C. Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips -- Ghirardelli
1 1/2 C. chopped walnuts

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Line baking sheets with parchment paper. Place the butter in a large bowl and cream lightly with an electric mixer. Add the sugars and beat on medium speed for about 2 minutes. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition.

Add the vanilla and lemon juice and mix well. In a separate bowl, stir together the flour, oatmeal, baking soda, salt and cinnamon.

Add to the creamed butter mixture and stir well to blend. Add chocolate chips and walnuts and stir to combine.

Using a 1/4 cup measure or a 2-oz ice cream scoop, drop the batter on the parchment-lined pans, leaving 2 -3 inches between each cookie.

Bake for 13 - 15 minutes or until lightly browned around the edges. Remove from parchment and cool on wire racks.


Famous Amos Raisin-filled Chocolate Chip Cookies

2 c Softened margarine-4 sticks
3/4 c Firmly packed light brown sugar
3/4 c Granulated sugar
1 tsp Vanilla
1 tsp Water
2 Eggs
2 1/2 c Flour
1 tsp Baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 c Raisins
1 pkg Chocolate chips-12 ounce

Beat softened margarine, brown and white sugars, vanilla, water and eggs in a large bowl with electric mixer until creamy and thoroughly blended. By hand, stir in flour, baking soda and salt until well mixed. Stir in raisins and chocolate chips. Using teaspoon from measuring set, spoon dough by teaspoonfuls onto cookie sheets. Allow 1 to 1-1/2 inches between cookies for spreading. Bake in moderate oven (375) for 8 minutes, or until cookies are nicely browned, depending on how crisp or well done you like them.


Hazelnut Chocolate Chip Cookies


12 oz butter

12 oz sugar

Blend in:

12 oz flour

12 oz chopped toasted hazelnuts

12 oz Ghirardelli Double chocolate chips

Form into about 40 cookies. Bake about 12 min @ 350 degrees F (until very slightly browned on the bottom, do not overcook)


Hilary Clinton's Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 1/2 c Flour

2 Eggs

1/2 c Sugar; granulated

1 c Shortening; vegetable

1 tsp Salt

2 c Oats; rolled, old fashioned

1 tsp Vanilla

1 c Sugar; brown, firmly packed

1 tsp Baking soda

1 pkg (12 oz.)Chocolate chips; semisweet

Approx. Cook Time: :10

Preheat oven to 350F.

Brush baking sheets lightly with vegetable oil. Combine flour, salt and baking soda on waxced paper. Beat together shortening, sugars and vanilla in large bowl with electric mixer till creamy. Add eggs and beattill light and fluffy. Gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in rolled oats and then chocolate chips. Drop batter by rounded teaspoonsfuls onto baking sheets. Bake in 350F oven for 8-10 minutes or till golden. Cool cookies on sheets for 2 minutes. Remove to wire racks to cool completely. Makes 7 dozen from


Michael Romano’s Reverse Chocolate Chunk Cookies

These rich brown cookies studded with chunks of white chocolate are a delicious, inside-out version of chocolate chip cookies. Since the cookie batter is brown to begin with, you won't be able to use their toasty color as a visual indication of doneness. To avoid overcooking, remove the cookies from the oven as soon as they puff up and are still slightly soft to the touch. The cookies will set as they cool, but should remain pliable rather than hard or crunchy.

1 1/4 cup sweet butter at room temperature

1 Tbs. sweet butter for buttering cookie sheets.

3/4 cup brown sugar

1 1/4 cups sugar

2 eggs

1 3/4 cup all purpose flour

1 1/4 cup cocoa powder

2 tsp. baking soda

10 oz. solid white chocolate, broken into 1/4 inch chunks (or 8 ounces white chocolate chips)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Lightly butter a cookie sheet, or alternatively, line the sheet with a strip of parchment paper. Set aside. In a mixing bowl, mix together the flour, cocoa powder and baking soda. Set aside. Using an electric mixer or a hand-held beater, cream the butter and sugars until the mixture is light and fluffy. Add the eggs and continue to beat until they are well-combined, about 1 minute. Mix in the flour, cocoa powder and baking soda mixture until well incorporated. Fold in the white chocolate chunks with a rubber spatula. Filling a tablespoon, scoop out individual cookies from the batter and place in even rows on the cookie sheet, leaving 2 inches of space between each cookie. Transfer the cookie sheet to the middle shelf of the oven, and bake for 8-10 minutes until the cookies are puffed and still to the touch. Remove the cookie sheet from the oven and allow cookies to cool and set for 5-7 minutes before carefully removing them with a spatula. If you have used a sheet of parchment paper, slide the entire sheet off the tray, and allow the cookies to cool for 5-7 minutes. Meanwhile, you may re-use the cookie sheet immediately for baking the next batch. Makes 60 cookies


Mrs. Field's Raisin Chocolate Chip Cookies

2 c Flour
1/2 tsp Baking powder
1/3 c Light brown sugar
1 c Sugar
1 c Butter, softened
2 lg Eggs
2 tsp Vanilla
2 c Raisins
2 c Semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 300*F. In a medium bowl combine flour and baking powder. Mix well with wire whisk and set aside. Blend sugars in a large bowl using an electric mixer at medium speed. Add butter and mix until grainy, scraping down the sides of the bowl. Add eggs and vanilla and mix at medium speed until smooth. Add the flour mixture, raisins and chocolate chips. Blend at low speed until just combined. Drop by rounded tablespoons onto ungreased baking sheets, 1 1/2 inches apart. Bake 22-24 minutes. Transfer cookies immediately to a cool, flat surface.


Nancy's Cream Cheese-Chocolate Chip Cookies

1/2 c Butter or Margarine (NOT diet!)
1 (3 ounce) package Cream Cheese, softened
1 tb Milk
1 c Sugar
1/2 tsp Vanilla
1 c regular (all purpose) Flour
1 bag of Mini or Regular Chocolate Chips
1/2 c Pecans or Walnuts, chopped

Heat oven to 375 F.

Cream butter or margarine, cream cheese and milk in medium bowl at medium speed of electric mixer until well blended. Beat in sugar and vanilla. Mix in flour. Stir in nuts and chocolate chips. Drop level measuring tablespoonfuls of dough 2 inches apart onto ungreased baking sheet, covered with parchment paper or they may get too brown or burn on the bottoms. Bake at 375 for 10 minutes. Remove to cooling rack. Makes 3 dozen 2 inch cookies. For a real different taste use white chocolate chips and 1 teaspoon orange or lemon rind & substitute Macadamia nuts.


Nancy's Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies

1/2 cup Butter (1 stick)
1/2 cup Vegetable Shortening (Crisco Butter Flavor)
1 cup Brown sugar, Light, Packed
1/2 cup Granulated Sugar
2 large Eggs
3 tsp Vanilla extract
1 1/2 cup All-Purpose Flour
3 cup Uncooked Oats
2 tsp Baking Powder
1 tsp Salt
1 tsp Cinnamon
1 cup Mini Chocolate Chips (you can use regular chocolate chips, I like the mini ones:

Combine the flour and baking powder and set aside. Melt butter/shortening in a microwave oven (use a microwave safe mixing bowl or a glass measuring cup) stopping and stirring every 15 seconds. Stop when the butter is more of a paste (usually about 30-60 seconds). Pour over granulated sugar, brown sugar, salt, cinnamon, and vanilla in a large mixing bowl and beat well. Add each egg separately beating until creamy. Add flour mixture (1/2 cup at a time) while beating. Fold in the oats and chocolate chips. Refrigerate for 1-3 hours in covered bowl. Pre-heat oven to 375°F 15 minutes prior to first batch. Drop onto a waxed paper (or baking parchment) lined, room-temperature, air-bake cookie sheet in large rounded tablespoonful size (or small ice-cream scooper). Bake 10-12 minutes checking every two minutes after 8 minutes for golden brown appearance. Remove sheet from oven and let stand 5 minutes before transferring to a cool/flat surface. Rinse and dry cookie sheet between batches. Makes about [5] dozen cookies.


Orange-Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 c Shortening
6 oz Cream Cheese; Softened,(2PK)
1/2 c Sugar; Granulated
1/2 c Brown Sugar; Packed
2 Eggs; Large
2 ts Orange Peel; Grated
1 ts Vanilla
2 c Flour; Unbleached
2 ts Baking Powder
1 ts Salt
6 oz Chocolate Chips; Semisweet
1/2 c Nuts; Finely Chopped(Option)

Servings: 12

Cream together shortening, cheese, and sugars. Add eggs, peel, and vanilla; beat well. Stir together flour, baking powder, and salt; add to creamed mixture. Mix well. Stir in chocolate chips. Drop from teaspoon 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet. If desired sprinkle lightly with nuts or granulated sugar. Bake at 350 degrees F about 10 minutes. Makes 6 dozen cookies.


Otis Spunkmeyer's Chocolate Chip Cookies

1/2 cup& Butter (1 stick)*
1/2 cup& Vegetable Shortening (Crisco Butter Flavor)*
1 cup Brown sugar, Light, Packed
1/2 cup Granulated Sugar
2 large Eggs
3 tsp Vanilla extract
2 3/4 cup All-Purpose Flour
2 tsp Baking Powder
1 tsp Salt
2 cups Chocolate Chips (one 10-12 oz package)
1 cup Chopped Walnuts (4 oz package - optional)

Combine flour and baking powder in a small bowl and mix with a whisk. Set aside. Melt butter/shortening in a microwave oven (use a microwave safe mixing bowl or a glass measuring cup) stopping and stirring every 15 seconds. Stop when the butter is more of a paste (usually about 45-60 seconds). Pour over granulated sugar, brown sugar, salt, and vanilla in a large mixing bowl and beat well. Add each egg separately beating until creamy. Add flour mixture (1/2 cup at a time) while beating. Refrigerate for 1-3 hours in covered bowl. Pre-heat oven to 375°F 15 minutes prior to first batch. Drop onto a waxed paper lined, room-temperature, air-bake cookie sheet in large rounded tablespoonful size (or small ice-cream scooper). Bake 10-12 minutes checking every two minutes after 8 minutes for golden brown appearance.


Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

1/2 cup margarine
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 egg
1 cup canned pumpkin
1 tsp. vanilla
2 1/2 cups flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. nutmeg
1 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 cup chopped nuts(walnuts or pecans)
1 cup chocolate chips

Cream margarine and sugar together until light and fluffy. Beat in egg, pumpkin, and vanilla. Mix and sift flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, nutmeg and cinnamon. Add to creamed mixture; mix well. Add chopped nuts & chocolate chips; mix thoroughly. Drop by teaspoons onto well-greased cookie sheets. Bake at 350 degrees for 10-12 minutes or until lightly browned. Remove from cookie sheets while warm and cool on racks. Makes 3 1/2 to 4 dozen cookies. This recipe can be doubled.


Ruth Wakefields Chocolate Chip Chip Cookies

1 stick or ¼ pound unsalted butter softened, but no liquid

1 jumbo egg

½ teaspoon baking soda

½ teaspoon salt

¼ cup white sugar

½ cup light or dark brown sugar

1 1/2 teaspoon imitation vanilla extract

1 1/8 cups flour. If the cookies come out too flat and runny,use a little more flour next time.

3 cups chocolate chips

1 ½ cups pecans whole or chopped

Preheat oven to 365 degrees F. Arrange oven racks so that your cookie rack is in the middle of the oven.

  1. In a large bowl, add softened butter, and egg.
  2. Sprinkle the ½ teaspoon baking soda, and ½ teaspoon of salt over the butter and egg.
  3. Add ¼ cup white sugar and ½ cup brown sugar.
  4. Pour 1 ½ teaspoon vanilla extract over the brown sugar.
  5. Mix ingredients just until evenly moist.
  6. Add 1 1/8 cups of flour and stir until incorporated.
  7. Add chocolate chips and nuts stirring until evenly blended.You may want to break up the nuts by breaking them into pieces before stirring them into the batter. I usually leave them whole and let the stirring process break up the nuts.
  8. Spray cookie sheets lightly with a aerosol oil like Pam.
  9. Use a teaspoon measure walnut size clumps of cookie dough onto cookie sheets. Do not crowd cookies. Leave space for them to spread out a little and not touch. Women seem to prefer smaller cookies. Men and children prefer larger cookies.
  10. Bake one cookie sheet at a time for about 13 minutes. Do not over bake.
  11. Cool cookie sheets on wire racks. Separate the cookies from the cookie sheets with a spatula or pancake turner before they cool completely.
  12. Store in closed container at room temperature. As with all quality baked goods, chocolate chip cookies taste best if eaten within 24 hours of being baked. After 24 hours the texture and taste of the cookies degenerates.


A recipe that contains so few ingredients shouldn't require artfulness to prepare, but it does. Although most recipes call for creaming the eggs and sugar before adding other ingredients, that process turns what should be a great chocolate chip cookie dough into something that tastes overly processed, something more like a mall cookie.

Do not use an electric mixer or food processor to make this recipe.Both appliances ruin the texture of chocolate chip cookie dough.

Do not refrigerate or freeze cookies. Even putting the cookies in a cold room overnight can change their flavor. They should remain a room temperature until they are eaten. If you can't eat all of the cookies you make, share some with a friend or neighbor.


Skaarup’s Almost Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

1/2 cup Butter (1 stick)*

1/2 cup Vegetable Shortening (Crisco Butter Flavor)*

1 cup Brown sugar, Light, Packed

1/2 cup Granulated Sugar

2 large Eggs

3 tsp Vanilla extract

2 3/4 cup All-Purpose Flour

2 tsp Baking Powder*

1 tsp Salt

2 cup Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips (one 12 oz package)

1 cup Chopped Walnuts (4 oz package - optional)

Combine flour and baking powder in a small bowl and mix with a fork. Set aside. Soften butter/shortening in a microwave oven (use a microwave safe mixing bowl or glass measuring cup) stirring every 15 seconds until very soft. Add granulated sugar, brown sugar, salt, and vanilla and beat well. Add each egg separately beating until creamy.

Add flour mixture (1/2 cup at a time) while beating. Add chocolate chips and nuts.

Refrigerate for 1-3 hours in covered bowl. Pre-heat oven to 375°F 15 minutes prior to first batch. Drop onto a waxed paper* lined (see below), room-temperature, air-bake cookie sheet in large rounded tablespoonful size (or small ice-cream scooper). Bake 10-12 minutes checking every two minutes after 8 minutes for golden brown appearance. Remove sheet from oven and let stand 5 minutes before transferring to a cool/flat surface. Rinse and dry cookie sheet between batches. Store in an air-tight container for up to one week. Makes about [5] dozen cookies.

TIP: Bake on waxed paper. Tear sheet to approximate size of cookie sheet; edges shouldn't hang over cookie sheet. During baking there may be some aroma and smoke from the waxed paper.

TIP: If you don't have (or won't try) waxed paper then cover cookie sheet with fresh aluminum foil. After removing from oven, slide foil and cookies off sheet together and let sit 5 minutes before removing the cookies from the foil with the back side of a spatula. Cool cookie sheet to room temperature before reapplying aluminum foil and dropping more cookies. Also aids in final clean-up.

TIP: If cookies become dry in the container then add a fresh piece of bread (loosely wrapped in a paper towel or wax paper or in a zip-lock bag with holes punched in it) to container and reseal. Rational: Water seeks equilibrium. The moisture (water) in the bread will leave it and enter the dry cookies. The result will be drier bread and more moist cookies.


Sourdough Chocolate Chip Cookies

4 1/2 cups all-purpose flour -- unsifted

2 teaspoons baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

1 cup butter -- softened

1 cup shortening -- softened

1 1/2 cups sugar

1 1/4 cups brown sugar -- packed

2 teaspoons vanilla

1 cup sourdough starter

4 eggs

1 3/4 cups walnuts -- chopped

2 12 oz pkgs chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 375degrees. In a large bowl, combine butter, shortening, sugars and mix well. Add eggs and beat until all are blended. Add vanilla and sourdough starter. Beat in flour, soda, salt and mix well. Stir in walnuts and chocolate chips. Drop by tablespoons onto greased cookie sheet. Bake 10 to 12 minutes. This makes 70 cookies and can be cut in half for smaller batches.


Spuddy Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

Many have said this is the best Chocolate Chip Cookie they've ever tasted; don't spoil it by telling them it contains potatoes. I like to call them my, "Little Spuddies."

1/2 cup Butter (1 stick)**

1/2 cup Vegetable Shortening (Crisco Butter Flavor)**

1 cup Brown Sugar, Light, Packed

1/2 cup Granulated Sugar (Extra-Fine Granulated Preferred)

2 large Eggs

3 tsp Vanilla Extract

2 cup All-Purpose Flour (or Whole Wheat Flour)

3/4 cup Potato Buds (instant Mashed Potato Mix)***

2 tsp Baking Powder*

1 tsp Salt

2 cup Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips (one 12 oz package)

1 cup Chopped Walnuts (4 oz package - optional)

Combine potato buds, flour, and baking powder in a small bowl and mix with a fork. Set aside. Soften butter/shortening in a microwave oven (use a microwave safe mixing bowl or glass measuring cup) stirring every 15 seconds until very soft. Add granulated sugar, brown sugar, salt, and vanilla and beat well. Add each egg separately beating until creamy. Add flour mixture (1/2 cup at a time) while beating. May add 1-2 tbsp milk if dough too firm. Add chocolate chips and nuts. Refrigerate for 1-3 hours in covered bowl. Pre-heat oven to 375°F 15 minutes prior to first batch. Drop onto a waxed paper lined, room-temperature, air-bake cookie sheet in large rounded tablespoonful size (or small ice-cream scooper). Bake 10-12 minutes checking every two minutes after 8 minutes for golden brown appearance. Remove sheet from oven and let stand 5 minutes before transferring to a cool/flat surface. Rinse and dry cookie sheet between batches. Makes about [5] dozen cookies.


Sunny Boy Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 cup Sunny Boy All-Purpose Flour
2 tbsp Water
1/2 tsp Baking Soda
1 tsp Vanilla
1 1/4 cup Sunny Boy Cereal
1/2 tsp Salt
1/2 cup Vegetable Shortening
1 cup Semi-sweet Chocolate Chips
1/2 cup Granulated Sugar
1 Egg
1/2 cup Brown Sugar
1/2 cup Raisins (Optional)

Mix together Sunny Boy flour, soda and salt into bowl. Add shortening, sugar, egg, water and vanilla. Beat until smooth. Add Sunny Boy cereal and combine thoroughly. Fold in chocolate chips and raisins. Drop from a teaspoon on a greased baking sheet and bake for approximately 15 minutes at 350 degrees.


The Neiman-Marcus Cookie (Urban Legend)

Okay, everyone....a true story of justice in the good old U.S. of A. Thought y'all might enjoy this; if nothing else, it shows internet justice, if it can be called that.

My daughter & I had just finished a salad at Neiman-Marcus Cafe in Dallas & decided to have a small dessert. Because our family are such cookie lovers, we decided to try the "Neiman-Marcus Cookie". It was so excellent that I asked if they would give me the recipe and they said with a small frown, "I'm afraid not." Well, I said, would you let me buy the recipe? With a cute smile, she said, "Yes." I asked how much, and she responded, "Two fifty." I said with approval, just add it to my tab.

Thirty days later, I received my VISA statement from Neiman-Marcus and it was $285.00. I looked again and I remembered I had only spent $9.95 for two salads and about $20.00 for a scarf. As I glanced at the bottom of the statement, it said, "Cookie Recipe - $250.00." Boy, was I upset!! I called Neiman's Accounting Dept. and told them the waitress said it was "two fifty," and I did not realize she meant $250.00 for a cookie recipe.

I asked them to take back the recipe and reduce my bill and they said they were sorry, but because all the recipes were this expensive so not just everyone could duplicate any of our bakery recipes....the bill would stand.

I waited, thinking of how I could get even or even try and get any of my money back.

I just said, "Okay, you folks got my $250.00 and now I'm going to have $250.00 worth of fun." I told her that I was going to see to it that every cookie lover will have a $250.00 cookie recipe from Neiman-Marcus for nothing. She replied, "I wish you wouldn't do this." I said, "I'm sorry but this is the only way I feel I could get even," and I will.

So, here it is, and please pass it to someone else or run a few copies....
I paid for it; now you can have it for free.

The Neiman-Marcus Cookie (recipe may be halved)

2 cups butter 4 cups flour

2 tsp. soda 2 cups sugar

5 cups blended oatmeal** 24 oz. chocolate chips

2 cups brown sugar 1 tsp. salt

1 8 oz. Hershey Bar (grated) 4 eggs

2 tsp. baking powder 3 cups chopped nuts

2 tsp. vanilla

Measure oatmeal and blend in a blender to a fine powder. Cream the butter and other sugars. Add eggs and vanilla; mix together with flour, oatmeal, salt, baking powder, and soda. Add chocolate chips, Hershey Bar and nuts. Roll into balls and place two inches apart on a cookie sheet. Bake for 10 minutes at 375 degrees. Makes 112 cookies. Have fun!!! This is not a joke --- this is a true story..

The Real Neiman Marcus Cookie Recipe

1/2 cup Unsalted Butter, Softened
1 cup Brown Sugar
3 tbsp Granulated Sugar
1 large Egg
2 tsp Vanilla Extract
1-3/4 cup All-Purpose Flour
1/2 tsp Baking Soda
1/2 tsp Baking Powder
1/2 tsp Salt
1-1/2 tsp Instant Espresso Powder, Slightly Crushed
8 ounce Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips

Cream the butter with the sugars until fluffy. Beat in the egg and the vanilla extract. Combine the dry ingredients and beat into the butter mixture. Stir in the chocolate chips. Drop by large spoonfuls onto a greased cookie sheet. Bake at 375°F for 8-10 minutes, or 10-12 minutes for a crispier cookie. Makes 12-15 large cookies

For several years, we have heard a story about the mythical Neiman Marcus cookie recipe. We don't know how it got started or who is perpetuating the myth, but this "cookie monster" just won't die! We would never charge anyone for a Neiman Marcus recipe. We share our restaurant recipes for free upon request.

This same story circulated in the late 1930's about a lady who dined at the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in New York. She liked the Red Velvet Cake so much she asked for the recipe. When she received her hotel bill, she had been charged $100 for the recipe. (This was during the Depression, so it seems our version of the story has been adjusted for inflation!)

Neiman Marcus never served cookies in our restaurants until recently, when we developed a new chocolate chip cookie in response to this myth! Following is the recipe (free of charge, of course.) Please feel free to share this letter and the recipe with anyone you know who may be similarly interested in the truth behind this "cookie that won't crumble!"


The Practically Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookie

This recipe was developed by Consumer Reports, known for their high standards. Here are their prefacing remarks:

We wanted a cookie with a chewy interior, crunchy edges, and well-blended flavor. Above all, we wanted a cookie with a high overall chocolate impact to give a sensuous rush to the chocoholic. After much experimentation and perhaps a few cumulative inches to staffers' waistlines, we created a cookie with all those assets. Our recipe makes 40 medium-sized cookies.

2-1/4 cups flour

1 level teaspoon baking soda

1 level teaspoon salt

3/4 cup each white and packed dark brown sugar

2 sticks (1/2 pound) sweet butter, room temperature

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 large eggs

12-ounce package Nestle semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 375 F. Mix the flour, baking soda and salt in a bowl and set aside. Use a stand-type electric mixer to mix the two sugars briefly at low speed. Add the butter in small gobbets, mixing first at low speed and then at high. Beat the mixture until it's pale, light, and very fluffy. Add the vanilla at the mixer's lowest speed, then beat at high speed for a few seconds. Add the eggs, again at the lowest speed, switching to high speed for the final second or so. The eggs should be well beaten in, and the mix should look creamed, not curdled. Add the flour mixture, a half cup at a time, mixing at low speed for about one minute, then at high speed for a few seconds. Scrape down the bowl's sides with a spatula, add the chocolate chips, and mix at low speed for about 10 seconds. If need be, scrape the bowl's sides again and mix for a few more seconds. Put tablespoons of the mix on an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake until the cookies are pale golden brown (nine minutes in an electric oven, 10 to 11 minutes in a gas one). Remove and let cool on a rack. Makes about 40 medium cookies.


The real, the original, the authentic Nestle Toll House Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

1 cup (2 sticks, 1/2 pound) butter, softened

3/4 cup granulated [white] sugar

3/4 cup packed brown sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 eggs

2 cups (12-ounce package) Nestle Toll House Semi-Sweet Chocolate Morsels

1 cup chopped nuts

Combine flour, baking soda and salt in small bowl. Beat butter, granulated sugar, brown sugar and vanilla in large mixer bowl. Add eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition; gradually beat in flour mixture. Stir in morsels and nuts. Drop by rounded tablespoon onto ungreased baking sheets. Bake in preheated 375-degree [Fahrenheit] oven for 9 to 11 minutes or until golden brown. Let stand for 2 minutes; remove to wire racks to cool completely